As we have been moving through this description of the excellent wife we have looked at her devotion to her husband/home and her character as a wife. Today these verses I have grouped together because they show us her attentiveness to others. We pick up in verse 20:
"She opens her arms to the poor,
and extends her hand to the needy,
when it snows she has no fear for her household
for all of them are clothed in scarlet.
She makes coverings for her bed,
she is clothed in fine linen and purple
Her husband is respected at the city gate
where he takes his seat among the elders of the land"
I am going to save verse 22 for next week (She makes coverings for her bed. She is clothed in fine linen and purple) and group it with her discretion for beauty. For today we will look at her relationship to others and how that impacts those around her.
There is no doubt in our minds that we live in a self-centered world. When relationships break we hear "He could not fulfill my needs" or "What can you give or do for me?" Children are taught that they will get everything they want from the most frivolous to the most costly. Parents buy, manipulate, go into debt and even steal to make their children happy. What this often creates is a self-centered world perspective. There is little empathy for those less fortunate. As a society we don't know how to give sacrificially...how to serve just for the simple pleasure of a sacrifice. We can see pictures and read of people who may be suffering, but few get out of their comfort to help.
This woman, we have been looking at for a couple of days, exhibits this quality of selflessness. We saw it with her husband and family and know we see it as she moves out of her main sphere of influence and into her neighborhood. The verse says
"She opens her arms to the poor, and extends her hand to the needy"
We are not told how far this act of service extends. We know she travels far to buy and sell. So we can assume that her sphere of influence is not just next door. What I love about this verse is the expression "she opens her arms". This phrase gives me the picture of holding nothing back. The expression "open arms" can go hand in hand with "open heart". She gives as she comes across those who have a need. I think of all the places she moves through and as she sees a need, she supplies freely towards that relief.
Thoughts like this make me think of how often do I run into someone in need but have no time to help. Often, where we used to live, on the way to school there would be homeless people selling newspapers out in the street. I would often even avoid the outside lane so they would not come right up to the window. How many of us have driven past someone at a stop light asking for help? This woman kept her heart open to those in need. She demonstrates compassion to the poor and the unfortunate who have needs. And it isn't that they come to her, but it is she that goes to them.
I can't help but think, as she did this on a regular basis that her family watched. There is no greater example we can set up for our children than to show them empathy for the less fortunate. To teach and model selflessness to our kids, gives them the right perspective of what they have. God is the giver and we are the custodian. If we have anything of value it is a mercy of God. So if that becomes the foundation, then we can freely release and give.
What a wonderful thing it is to teach our kids to give. To always be ready to let go and let others have. As we display this we teach them also that they are not the center of the world, but just instruments to be used by God to serve.
The words "she extends her hands" means she works...actually helping...physical work. She just doesn't give and then leave...she invests her energy , gets right in there and works. There are many ministries around us. How about reading to kids at a center for abused women. What about serving lunch at a homeless shelter? Mission trips? What a difference we can make if we "open our arms" to those less fortunate?
We see that her influence goes first to her home then outside her home. All of this "good" she does benefits her husband and family. So much so, that we see in verse 23
"Her husband is respected at the city gate, where he takes his seat among the elders of the land"
This is very interesting. All this influence she has in her home, neighborhood and community elevates her husband to a position of honor. In the Middle East at this time, at the gate of the city, men who would discern the law would judge disputes. This comes from Deut. 16:18 ""you shall appoint for yourself judges and officers in all your towns...they shall judge the people with righteous judgement" Here at the gate, is where the "seat of justice" was...where disputes where settled and only the most honored men could make such judgements. Her husband is now there...rendering righteous opinions to resolve disputes among the people of the town. The point is, this man has a great reputation among the leaders of the city and this reputation is undergirded by his wife, because she is doing everything to make him everything he ought to be. She contributes to his success by working behind the scenes so he is unburdened with distractions. She has done all she can to build his reputation...she speaks best of him to others, she does not tear him down publicly and she speaks of him with the highest respect and admiration. WOW!
So many applications here...How do we speak about our husbands to others? Even to our children? I once heard a woman say our children should think their fathers hung the moon! But how sad that often they hear the opposite.
That's the excellent wife...she is hard to find...but not impossible!
Tomorrow we will look at her discretion for beauty...inside and out.
WHAT ARE YOUR THOUGHTS SO FAR? I KNOW WE HAVE BEEN COEVERING A LOT...IT SURE IS QUIET OUT THERE!
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